Everybody has a fear. I have a fear. Well, I wish it was just one.
I have a fear of balloons, a phobia called Globophobia. There are thousands of different phobias, some of them are considered as ''normal'' because they are more popular like claustrophobia or arachnofobia but there's a huge world of phobias often called weird and stupid. I hate when people make fun of it and think that I could beat my fear if they put a balloon on my face and start squeezing it. NO! I panic!! I
have a panic attack. I start sweating, shaking and crying when they do
that. So, what's the funny thing about doing it? Is it fun making people cry? Do they laugh about someone
wanting to die? Do they think it's okay to attack someone where it hurts them the
most when they just tell them their weakness?
I'm not sure of where does this phobia comes from but it's been getting stronger as I have grown up. I remember the day I realized that this phobia existed and that there was
other people like me. I was eleven and I was at a birthday party. I was having
fun trying to keep myself away from ballons/people holding balloons. Then I saw
a boy running scared and hiding under a table from a girl with balloons trying
to cath him. In that moment I knew that I wasn't the only one and I felt confident about it
for the first time in forever. But this confidence lasted for a few seconds
after I heard a boy laughing and saying "Look at him! He has globophobia! He's so weird!" If I heard those words now, I could have tell that boy that it is okay to be like that and it wouldn't have affected me that much but the eleven-year-old me kept that fear inside and felt strange and out of place, and the worst part, she didn't tell anybody about her fears in a long time. I wish I could have been braver.
This sucks. I hate being afraid of something that is normally related to celebrations and happy times. I hate not being able to have fun at parties because my eyes are focused on balloons.
Globophobia hurts. It hurts watching people you used to love and considered as friend start to making fun of you, and even though you tell them to stop with tears in your eyes, they keep pinching balloons and putting them close to you. It hurts me watching my friends rejecting to have fun in school parties (which are full of balloons) because they are supporting me and helping me to stay calmed. It hurts me that my friends are forced to run away from balloons with me and distract me going somewhere else when I know they may prefer to stay.
Even though globophobia has brought me bad things, it also has helped me. It has helped me to understand that different is beautiful. I used to be really ashamed of that ''weird'' fear but as I have been growing up I have learnt to deal with that. Now I introduce myself like: Hello, my name is Mar and I am globophobic. I now even enjoy the gesture they put on their faces and say: Really?. I don't know why but I find it really funny.
It also has helped me to find out who are my real friends. The ones who stay with me when I have a panic attack (even though I never told them that I was dying inside), the ones who will always pick up the phone when I need to speak to somebody because the people around me were the ones that caused me so much pain, the one that never judge me because of it and support and help me from more than 5000 km away. They know who they are and I am extremely grateful to have them in my life.
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| Show everybody who you are and do it proudly!! |
You deserve to be happy, to be okay with who you are. It sometimes may get difficult to achieve it so I have given you a list of some of the things that have helped me:
1. Find someone you feel comfortable with and tell him/her about your fears.
2. Keep away from any negative mind.
3. Find the one that inspires you the most: your mother, your best friend, your favourite celebrity... (in my case it always has been Taylor Swift)
4. Apreciate more every little thing (like morning walks, waking up with the sunlight, a smile...)
5. Try to smile more
6. Never listen to the ones telling you to do something you don't want to and you know it won't help you.
7. Find people like you in some association or anywhere else. In my case Tumblr was really helpful, you may be amazed of how many people like me I found.
Hope you enjoyed that post and I hope it helped you in some way. I just wanted you to feel better with who you are and help the ones with a phobia or fear.
Love you all!!! <3
